Queen Vashti
I am moving the prayer focus to the beginning this week. Pray and ask God to reveal to you times when He used your sins and stupidity (sorry) and used them for His purposes. Pray that He reveal to you times when your sense of propriety may have made you go against your husband. Esther 1:1-2:4
This first chapter of Esther shows us God’s divine knowledge.
‘Known unto God are all his works from the beginning of the world. Acts 15:18(KJV)
It is designed to show us how God laid the ground work for Esther to become queen. As you read this remember that this was around 465 B.C. so the Women's Lib Movement hadn't started yet. In other words ladies you can get mad and argue but the fact is refusal to obey a husband got you in a heap of trouble.

This chapter shows how God serves His own purposes even by the sins and stupidity of men, which He would not permit if He doesn’t know how to bring good from them.

Can you think of times in your life that God used your sins and maybe even your stupidity to bring about good for His purposes?

Many times the Lord has used my sins or poor decisions to work out his will in my life. A lot of the times God taught me and showed me his purpose when I was raising my son and daughter. So many times I expected them to be perfect and I myself was a sinner saved by grace. I look back and see how hard I made it on the children God lent me and my heart is saddened. Yes, I am forgiven but looking back or examining myself teaches me how God used every detail of my motherhood to raise the children he gave me. Also, with regards to my husband, I remember times when submission to him was not in my list of to do's. Really? Submitting to him was not on my list of being a good noble wife. Well, the truth be known, God showed me to love and submit to him meant to love and submit to the partner he gifted me with. We came from such opposite lifestyles and I had no idea what it was like to let the man be head of the home. Yet, through salvation and growing up to please the Lord I learned a lot of what he expects of me as a wife. I have to admit: it isn't easy. I always have to ask myself: whom do you love Mammy?

Esther 1:1-9 Feast of Xerxes

The first feast was with his nobles and the like. The second was a drinking feast.
8The only restriction on the drinking was that no one should be compelled to take more than he wanted. But those who wished could have as much as they pleased, for the king had instructed his staff to let everyone decide this matter for himself. (NLT)
Queen Vashti was giving a feast for the lady guests at the same time.

Can you imagine this? What kind of party must have this have been! I know for me when we get together at church we have a really good time, we get silly and laugh a lot. I know that we must seem drunk to others, but in truth we are high on the Holy Spirit and the pleasure of Christian friends and family.

I have to be very honest, even though this was a regular practice of the Persian Empire/King, I find it bizarre that they had to get tipsy to enjoy. For every time the King raised his cup the party was required to drink another drink. Reminds me of the world's parties, drunken, out of control etc....

I prefer to party with brothers and sisters in the Lord. I love the joy, laughter, happiness, and just plain unity among us. The Holy Spirit fills us up when we are centered on the Lord.

The people had to be brought in in groups each day. There was so many that it had to be held in the courtyard of the palace garden. Think about how this must have been. Take the time to re-read these verses and describe if you can what it must have been like. Why were the women separate?

A large crowd of people who were pleasing their king. The reason the women were separate because the King had not invited them to the banquet. For any one who did not receive a special invitation would be killed if they entered into any part of the palace of the king. Only when the king extended his golden scepter could the guest enter in his presence.

Esther 1:10-12

The king ‘into his drinks’ calls for Vashti. In fact he sent 7 honorable messengers. He wants to show off his wife! She is very beautiful. (vs. 11) She refuses. (vs. 12) Remember that this was 465 B.C. keep that in mind as you answer the questions

Was it wrong for him to send for her as her king? Why?

Not at all. She was his queen and he royally summoned her to his presence. When the king summoned her at this point it was a good thing.

Was it wrong for her to send for her as her husband? Why?

The king had summoned his wife to enter his presence but I do not agree it was right. This king was abusing his rights as her king. Yes, he was going to show off her beauty and it appears he only wanted her to wear her crown only. I consider this an abuse of her and it must have been degrading. I feel this probably wasn't the only time Queen Vashti had been called to parade around the king's quest's in such a humliating condition. It's like this using a today situation: my husband say's he would like me to wear a very short skirt or low blouse to church. The reason he asks me this is because it will please him. Now, my conscience tells me its not pleasing to God and so I pray and ask God what I need to do? The Lord reveals to me this is not right and so I share with my husband my discomfort in honoring his request. Now, I do not share this to make anyone not honor their husbands but I must share truths.

What are the things Vashti did wrong? Why?

I think Vashti should have sent a message to the king sharing why she felt compelled not to enter his party and be paraded around. I also think she could have sent him a message back with a more tender response to how she could please him without losing her self-respect. I look at Queen Vashti in a different light because I see in the book of Esther that the king had a major drinking problem. It just wasn't a Persian thing to do. He had to get high to enjoy his parties and the company he kept. (The king is the one who signed decrees and so when he raised his cup each party guest raised theirs and drank to him.)

Does it seem to you that Vashti was un-repentant?

I do not see that in scripture in fact: I do not know what really happened to her after she refused. I wonder if the king had her banished or even killed? If the question you are asking is "did she repent" of refusing to honor the kings request: than I can safely say no she did not.

Why do you think this?

The king became furious and his anger burned within him. This leads me to think he did something to her after the party was over. If Queen Vashti would have repented the king's temper would have cooled down some. But as we see her refusal to obey the king got the whole kingdom in an uproar. A decree was sent out and every man was to be the master in his own house. And Vashti no longer would come before the king.

What do you think the outcome would have been if Vashti would have come when the king beckoned?

Esther would not have become queen at this time.

As we see God used the stupidity and the defiance of Vashti to set the scene for Esther to become the Queen.

Esther1:13-21

The Royal Decree

The king had already made one mistake. His mistake shamed him in front of all of his followers. He couldn’t afford to make another. So he calls trusted advisors who knew Persian law. Though he as king could have forgiven and forgotten Vashti’s "sin" as king because this had happened publicly he couldn’t let it go. I know today we see this as a silly thing for the men to be worried about but back then it was a big thing. God chose to use this as a way to get a queen who would follow instruction and in turn be a catalyst in the defeat of Haman. A man who if he had had his way would have wiped out the Jewish people, and most definitely Christ's linage.

Pray and thank God for taking your mistakes and using them for His purposes.

Part 2: Optional

After reading the story of Vashti can you look back in your years of marriage and remember times that you brought shame to your husband?

As much as I hate to admit it, of course I have embarrased him. The thing that embarrases my husband is when I talk and not think before I say it. Really? Instead of carefully pondering over issues, I tend to react emotionally. I am totally sure that embarrasses my sweetheart. When I spout off like steam in a tea pot.

How about times you refused to honor his requests?

I have hurt him and I can see it in his eyes. But a lot of times we can sit down and reason together and that is the part of our relationship that Jesus Christ is glorified in. When I was younger I acted as a child but now am older and have learned through many mistakes. Praise God that he has shown us a better way to be happy and respectful of one another in our relationship. God has worked many miracles in our marriage and for that I give him all praise and all glory. I am grateful my husband is the head of our home and respect him in that appointment by God.

In the beginning of our marriage we mutually disrepected one another but today we have submitted our lives to God to oversee and help us to grow closer. I choose daily to love, respect, and submit under God's authority in my marriage. To be married for 36+ years is a miracle only God can do.

I pray any thoughts submitted with regards to Vashti are not discouraging to anyone or mis-applied. I see many lessons from this wonderful lesson on how God uses "poor choices" and turns them into deliverance for his people. Please: I do not want you to feel I disagree with submitting to husbands. I believe we should always have a heart of submission. I pray all our husbands will encourage us to be all that God calls us to be. I pray they will honor God by loving us as God does. I pray that each husband will love their wives as Christ loved the church.

I pray each of us will die to self so that our husbands can fully be heads of our homes. I pray we truly lift them up in prayer because their responsibilities are great.

This lesson is truly a challenge....

(If you aren’t married please remember that though this is mainly about husbands and wives it is also about our relationship with Christ.)

I have, especially in the early years of my marriage. It resulted in fights and hurt feeling. It also almost resulted in divorce. Whether my husband was wrong or not wasn’t the issue. My disobedience was. I hated having to do things his way! Oh how I wish I knew then what I know now! When I was 21 I had to get a job to help pay bills. We only had one car. My husband decided to work late on night and that meant that I had no babysitter for my 3 year old son. I showed up at his work and pitched a fit. Then in anger I slammed out of the office. I slammed the door so hard it jammed and had to opened with a crow bar. I had shamed Robert and embarrassed him terribly.

He was very angry and didn’t talk to me for 3 days. When he finally did he told me he was shipping me home to my mother. We were in Mississippi and my parents in Houston. We almost divorced over this. I had to learn how to be a wife. This shaming of my husband brought me to my knees before God. He has used my mistake for His purposes in my life many times. Whenever I lose my cool and get angry this time pops into my head. I cool down quickly after that.

As Christian women we have an obligation to show the younger generations of daughters how to be submissive. Dirty word submission but it shouldn’t be. If you are a God fearing Christian wife with a God fearing Christian husband this is easy.

Lift your husband and marriage in prayer. Thank God for your husband and ask for help to only bring honor to him.